Unemployment

I have always disliked the unknown. I don't like not knowing where I will live, what job I will have or who I may be fortunate to live near. I've applied to countless jobs in a wide spectrum of NY, NJ and CT, have heard back from many and have had even several rounds of interviews... but nothing seems to amount to anything. I want to be neat Clinton, I want to be near Kim and I want to be near my family. I can't have all three. I hope Clinton and I work out, long distance can be hard. He just gets me and it's wonderful.

So far I have subbed five days, and am hoping for a few more before the school year ends. I want to go to the gym daily. I want to lose 10 pounds and tone up. I am not over weight, though want to improve my diet and some corners ;)

This summer I also want to go back to DC. I just need to see everything again and finally get over this heavy weight in my stomache from how I left before. In my past, I have had my share of mistakes, challenges and problems I put on myself. I have learned and grown from each one, but for some reason I am struggling to get over the summer of "Dana" haha. It isn't Dana I miss, though I resent him for how he broke up with me and how he never spoke to me again after I found everything out. I need some sort of closure and I am not sure how to obtain it. I am hoping if I visit the city again and realize it is in my past, I can put things in check and move on. This is not to say I feel stuck in the past, though I hate having such a negative feeling about something I feel I can change how I view it.

I just want to be happy with myself.